{"id":279,"date":"2007-06-23T08:27:46","date_gmt":"2007-06-23T12:27:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.summerofjim.com\/2007\/06\/23\/preparing-for-absences\/"},"modified":"2020-08-03T09:55:11","modified_gmt":"2020-08-03T13:55:11","slug":"preparing-for-absences","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/?p=279","title":{"rendered":"Preparing for Absences"},"content":{"rendered":"

The last day of school fell on an early June day in 1960 for Miss Palmer’s 5th Grade Class at Hamden Hall.\u00a0 The Class members were: John Bassett, Sarah Beebe, Charles Clark, Emily Evans, Stephen Gant, Jean Gaylord, Margaret Gaylord, Gary Hopson, Mary-Austin Humphrey, Elizabeth Learned, John Marra, Francine Matas, Carole McDonnell, Duncan Moffit, Gary Moss, Naomi Plakins, Kathy Talalay, Jane Wang & Jimmy Winston.<\/em><\/p>\n

The last day of school was the best.\u00a0 Summer vacation to begin… and to begin without the precursor final exams that take place in the later grades.\u00a0 Exams that cause anxiety and worry, which in turn adds to a sense of relief to the last day for those higher grades.<\/p>\n

But in the 5th Grade there is nothing to deflect the joy in beginning the long vacation… no concern for how your grades\u00a0affected your academic record and impacted your chances for getting into college, or when you would have to begin a summer job.\u00a0 No, in the 5th Grade it’s all sunshine, smiles, riding your bike thru the neighborhood, swimming in the Sound, eating watermelon in the backyard and spitting the pits all over the lawn, running under the sprinkler, movies on rainy days.\u00a0 For someone who was 10 years of age how could it get better?<\/p>\n

Hamden Hall was a unique school… a Private Country Day School — Kindergarten thru Twelve.\u00a0 Sure there were Private Boarding Schools that handled the upper grades, like Hotchkiss in Lakeville.\u00a0 There were Private Day Schools that handled the lower grades, like Foote School in New Haven… and there were even Private Day Schools that just had the upper grades like Hopkins (a school, by the by, that pre-dates the founding of Yale).\u00a0 Hamden Hall? We had it all… diapers to diploma.\u00a0 And Co-Educational, too… in an era of single gender private upper schools.<\/p>\n

And like other Private (non-Parochial)\u00a0Schools, we did not have students from a specific neighborhood… students did not even come from the same<\/em> city… we were from all over the place.\u00a0 You expect that at Hotchkiss… “Biff” from Grosse Pointe, the “Lynch Man” from Lake Forest, “Trey” from Sewickley.\u00a0 But this was 5th Grade at Hamden Hall… and for 10 year olds we were scattered to the winds.<\/p>\n

The last day of school you’re incredibly happy.\u00a0 Hell, you’re a 6th Grader now!\u00a0 You say good-bye to your classmates… “see you next year!”\u00a0 In the school world<\/em> September represents next year… “have a great summer!”<\/p>\n

A far different scenario would have taken place at Edgewood School — the Public Elementary School a half mile from my home on Alston Avenue.\u00a0 The excitement would have been much the same.\u00a0 “Hurray!\u00a0 Summer is here!\u00a0 No school!”\u00a0 But there would have been no need to say “see ya’ next year” to your classmates because you would see them the next day riding their bikes in the neighborhood.<\/p>\n

At Hamden Hall you said “good bye”, and in my case anyway, not knowing what they would be doing in their neighborhoods tomorrow, nor even if they would return in September.<\/p>\n

The summer between my 5th and 6th Grade years, the only classmate I saw was Gary Moss.\u00a0 On weekends we would see each other at the pool of Woodbridge Country Club… swim all day, hit the snack bar, drink iced chocolates,\u00a0savor hot fudge sundaes… and not<\/em> think about school.<\/p>\n

The ending days of summer were filled with anticipation.\u00a0 Seeing classmates who you hadn’t seen all summer.\u00a0 Then, would there be new students?\u00a0 Who would not be returning?\u00a0 On day one, you would look forward to the return of familiar faces.<\/em>\u00a0 Their absence in our day-to-day lives would have only been slightly noticed in July and August… but now a few short days before the new year the air\u00a0would be\u00a0tinged with excitement.<\/p>\n

One mid-September day in 1960 Mrs. Bear welcomed to her 6th Grade Class: Sarah Beebe, Charles Clark, Walter Damuck, Emily Evans, Stephen Gant, David Gitlitz, Gary Hopson, Mary-Austin Humphrey, Elizabeth Learned, John Marra, Francine Matas, Carole McDonnell, Cynthia Michel, Duncan Moffit, Gary Moss, Naomi Palkins, Kathy Talalay, Jimmy Winston.<\/em><\/p>\n

Many lessons in life are only learned in after the fact reflection… or better put, fully appreciated.\u00a0 <\/em>At an early age, without knowing it, we\u00a0acquired a sense for\u00a0absences.\u00a0 <\/em>We learned that folks who we see every day as part of lives, are at times absented for a long time<\/em> (as summer vacation appears to a 10 year old); but then return to our lives.<\/p>\n

We learn that the absences can apply apply to family and friends.\u00a0 But as we grow older these absences are not just July and August; these absences can span years and decades.\u00a0 And in those intervening years the special nature of the connections retain the\u00a0memory of shared times and stories never old.<\/p>\n

I am lucky… I hear from and see Gary Moss on a fairly regular basis (although there was a large block of time he lived in Europe when we were out of contact)… but this October I hope to see Chuck Clark, Carole McDonnell, Francine Matas and Kathy Talalay among the other graduates at our 40th High School reunion.<\/p>\n

And as for the absence?\u00a0 Sorta like the\u00a0summer before entering Ethel Bear’s 6th Grade Class…<\/p>\n

It was just a little longer.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The last day of school fell on an early June day in 1960 for Miss Palmer’s 5th Grade Class at Hamden Hall.\u00a0 The Class members were: John Bassett, Sarah Beebe, Charles Clark, Emily Evans, Stephen Gant, Jean Gaylord, Margaret Gaylord, … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-279","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-childhood"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/279","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=279"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/279\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":110275,"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/279\/revisions\/110275"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=279"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=279"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/summerofjim.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=279"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}