The first to arrive at the home of Gaius Cassius Longinius was Servilius Casca, and he was quickly followed by Tillius Cimber, Rubrius Ruga, Sextius Naso… and finally Marcus Junius Brutus. Brutus brought the leaflets and the large laminated poster:
NOW APPEARING AT THE FORUM
An evening of beautiful musical entertainment
Athenian Ballads * Hebrew Marching Songs * Current Popular Tunes
ONE NIGHT ONLY
The Ides of March
CASSIUS: Not bad. I like it. He’ll never suspect anything.
CASCA: Are we really going to go thru with this?
CASSIUS: We all agreed that Ceasar has got to go. He is a threat to the Republic. Declaring himself Dictator for Life? Are you kidding? It would be easier if he were hated by the lower classes… then they could kill him! But the son-of-a-bitch is too popular. So we’ll have to do it… we’ll do it to save the Republic and all the Red States!
BRUTUS: Cassius who is going to play the drums?
CASSIUS: Drums? What the hell are you talking about?
BRUTUS: You know… in the Liberatores. Who is going to play the drums?
CASSIUS: No one is going to be playing the drums, you ninny! That’s just a ruse to get Ceasar to the Forum so we can take turns stabbing him repeatedly or hitting him with a baseball bat like DeNiro did to that guy in the Untouchables.
BRUTUS: Oh… well, I guess that’s a good thing. I didn’t know any Hebrew Marching Songs.
CASSIUS: Cimber are you sure that Ceasar got his copy of the leaflet?
CIMBER: I think so…
CASSIUS: Think so? Think so! Listen… we got to be sure that he shows up. I already paid for all these fancy Swiss knives and bats… what do you think? And those knives have all those neat attachments… I got them on sale and I can’t even return them! Shit! Hand me my cell phone… Hello! Who is this? Oh… hello Calpurnia, would you put Julius on the phone, yes… yes I can wait ’til he is finished going #2… he’s probably playing with himself… Hey Jay Jay… good to hear your voice. You’re beautiful, just beautiful. Look, I know it’s late; but a few of us have put a group together and we have a gig at the Forum on the Ides. You’ll love it, some period things, a few covers and some original stuff, too. Brutus? Sure, he’s playing Fender Bass. Wild, huh? Anyway we don’t want you to miss it… we’ll save you a seat in the front row. Yeah, sure you can sit in on a number! We’ll give you the cowbell! What? Can we “cover” Don’t Fear the Reaper? Sure, you got it! What? No,no… leave Calpurnia behind. After the show we can all go out and get wasted. Be there or be square! I can count on you right? I knew it! You’re beautiful, just beautiful! Well, that’s that. He wants to sit in on “Don’t Fear the Reaper”! Can you imagine?
BRUTUS: Cassius, I don’t know how to play the Fender Bass. Although I think I can fake singing a Hebrew Marching Song.
CASSIUS: Here’s a bat Brutus. Don’t harm yourself.