My day was not going well… nothing that $100,000 or a whisky wouldn’t cure. And then I looked at the change I got from Pauli’s Bagels first thing in the morning (a plain “everything” bagel and a grapefruit juice), and included therein was a shiny new penny (shiny, so you know I didn’t pick this up from the #3 pump at the Global Gas Station)… but , on closer inspection, this one was different… it had a different reverse side from our 16th President.
No, it’s not Dolly Parton or a Big Mac (although my research has revealed that those choices were in the top 10 finalists for the new “rear” of Lincoln).
Personally… I think this is now the best coin we have. Better than the “wheatie” penny by miles, and forget the Lincoln Memorial penny. *whew* good riddance.
Anyway… I discovered the change in coin in time for me to cut out of work a bit early (I informed our proprietor that I had developed a case of gangrene sitting at my desk, and I was going to see a barber/surgeon to have my leg removed), and headed for TD Bank and immediately converted three hundred dollars into the new pennies.
I took the pennies out of those silly plastic wraps (whatever happened to those pretty paper wrappers… now I have to worry about discarded penny wrappers killing dolphins), and put them into a rather handsome carpetbag and loaded same into my hummer.
Time to hit the Ash Creek Saloon (no, I didn’t have my leg removed… that was just a story I fed to the boss)… I hired a local urchin (think of him as a contemporary version of Passepartout) to carry in my stash. I greeted one and all. I nursed a whisky, and then, I could barely contain my excitement…
“Could I have my tab?”
I placed several scoops of the new Lincolns on the bar… I can’t tell you how much this act pleased me!
“Oh, Keri… while you count out my spare change… perhaps you could refreshen my Wild Turkey?”
Lord bless the Philadelphia Mint, tomorrow I hit Starbucks and Friday it’s Stop & Shop (they’ll love me in the express lane!). The world lay before my feet.
And yes, I have put the urchin on retainer.