Today’s entry is courtesy of the Charming Miss Barbara, who is the evening Shepherdess at Grapes. She keeps the couth around the Bullpen… putting a stop to the more vulgar displays that we are occasionally prone to. However, when prompted she has been known to give me the finger; but only if I deserve it. She rarely resorts to cursing, even though I tell her that I love it when women talk dirty.
No matter.
Now the tale presented here comes under the category of “male bashing“. So for the female members of my association who take uncommon joy in the sport… this one is for you.
This particular story I had heard before. The original story line did not have the “male bashing” part, rather it was reversed to your typical “women haters” joke. Either way, the joke is funny… and since we are in the midst of a Republican Convention I have decided to promote the version that Barbara has bestowed to us.
And if you find the previous sentence a non-sequitor… too bad.
The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After the necessary background checks, interviews and testing were done there were 3 finalists. Two men and a woman.
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. “We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill her!!”
The man said, “You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife”.
The agent said, “You’re not the right man for the job. Take your wife and go home”.
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, “I tried, but I can’t kill my wife.”
The agent said, “You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.”
Finally, it was the woman’s turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. she took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after the another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, she wiped the sweat from her brow.
“This fucking gun was loaded with blanks… I had to beat him to death with a chair.”