Mr. Billy

Look around… who can you trust with your ills? It ain’t your Doctor… that’s purely medical… and that’s not what I’m talking about. No.

And sometimes you can’t talk to your “significant other” either. Maybe that part pinches a bit… you know, you would think we could talk to someone who we are intimately connected to… but no, not always. We conceal our ills from those who we are closest to… maybe it hurts more to reveal a vulnerability? (it’s not their fault… it’s just the way it is).

So where is it safe? Where is it comfortable? Where can you go to be whole? Man, there are oodles of corner joints… places where there is a chair for us, faces familiar & lights low enough to obscure our presence and preserve our anonymity.

It is there, on this night, that Mr. Billy reigns supreme. On other nights it could have been Sean or Kelly patrolling the business side of the bar at Ash Creek Saloon.

One time I got to thinking, “Does Billy own a pair of pants?” I don’t think I have ever seen him working the bar, regardless of the season, in anything other than shorts. No matter. Billy is always there with a word, a smile, a thrust of a welcoming hand, a “howya doin’?”… and he is lightening quick to refill your glass with some of Kentucky’s finest.

To be there seems to be enough… a scritch and rub to your soul.

Trade places? I have been on Billy’s side. Many years. I like it better on this side. But I confess that sometimes I itch to go behind the bar again. To draw a beer, mix a Madras, chill the glasses for a perfectly built Martini… Oh yes, a brilliant Martini. Moving from one citizen to another, administering an elixir, providing a word or two, helping the wait staff, settling checks… not dropping a beat.

I do appreciate Billy’s work. I recognize his skill and “charm”. And more than anything else, I thank Billy for the respect and kindness he favours each of us, some in more need than others, and in particular I thank him for his smile and a wink to those who are suffering the “slings and arrows of outrageous fortune”… for it is the knowing smile and a wink that is infinitely more valuable than anything found in a glass.

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In Mothers’ Arms

I guess you could say that I work in a “mixed neighborhood”. In this case it means a couple of things. It is a neighborhood of small businesses that line the Boston Post Road… a transmission place (two in fact), auto glass, two body shops, a cemetery monument place (every now and then I go and check out the new models), Cablevision, Ash Creek Saloon (known by all as my second “Office”), the Exxon gas station where the courtly Maheesh presides in its “mini-mart”.

Then into this blend of commercial enterprises are the residential homes, or maybe better put “living units”. There are a few houses, always large and somewhat in disrepair… and invariably home to a cluster of people. We can assume that they are of the same family, or in someway connected by kinship, or maybe they just came from the same village.

We also have a small apartment complex that sits on the other side of the transmission place. I guess it would be called “low income housing”. I have an acquaintance that lives there and he pays $1000. a month (I think I am going to have to move to Kentucky). Regardless of the rent, families share flats there as well. Except Howard, now divorced, who lives in a flat by himself.

The other part of our “mixed” neighborhood is the varied cultural background of the inhabitants. Mostly we see South American Hispanics (gee, I hope that word is “politically” correct), some Central American Hispanics, Blacks, Island Blacks & Howard the Jew.

I get to work usually at 7:00AM and I am there ’til 9:00PM on most days… and in that time I get to see the faces & hear the voices. I will see them at “Chez Maheesh” when I go to grab a cup of Joe or a Diet Coke… I will see them when I put out my sand chair and grab some 5:00PM sun in our parking lot (known affectionately as my Lido). I am a marginal presence in their life, as they are in mine… we just happen to be sharing the same place at the same time.

Yesterday brought me out of my desk at a different time… it was only 8:00AM & usually I don’t go out for my first fix of “dark roast” ’til 9:30AM… but yesterday was a beautiful spring morning & I needed to take it in, it was the type of day that makes you feel good to be alive: the sky blue, the air slightly warmer than cool, buds on the trees beginning to show…

I look left and right, taking everything in. I see her approaching from the right… maybe she lives in the apartments down the street. She has red-ish coloured hair, flat and below her shoulders and in her arms she is carrying her daughter. At first glance I thought that, “my that’s a big kid to have to carry around…” But as she approached I could see that the woman was on the petite side, and her daughter only appeared big by contrast… the little girl was actually quite young. The little girl had dark hair and wore a dress, white ankle socks turned down and sneakers. There was a serious expression on the Mother’s face, whereas the child had this marvelous look of comfort… sort of the way a “Joey” looks inside Mama’s pouch, except this “Joey” had her hands intertwined around Mama’s neck.

There was firmness to the Mother’s step, no sense of effort or burden. She merely continued up the sidewalk not troubled by anything and never once having to re-position her bundle.

Some forty yards behind came another woman… a young Black woman… and she is also carrying her daughter in her arms. Maybe they live in the apartments, too. The little girl is sporting several tight braids each decorated with a colourful doo-dad and as her Mother strides up the walk; the girl looks up at the trees and absentmindedly fidgets with her braids.

And like the Mother in front of her, this Mother had no need to shift the weight of her daughter to lessen the load. Each step is followed by another.

Tracy Elementary School is a third of a mile away (maybe a half mile?). And both of these little girls (they have to be in Kindergarten) simply hitched a ride with their Moms.

I am too old to remember being carried by my Mother… I certainly have memories of seeing my kids being carried by Ellen… I loved carrying them, too… and maybe it’s why I love seeing Mothers with children in their arms. Can there be a better feeling than holding a child close to your breast, to feel its rhythm and warmth?

I love watching nature shows… mother lions carrying their cubs in their mouths, mother gorillas tenderly cuddling their babies… there’s something compelling there… something comforting… something that seems to be at the base of life, something that we all need.

And I look again as the two Mothers make their way to Tracy School. I smile. Did the kids really need the “ride”, or did the Mothers really need the press of their daughters’ bodies to theirs?

Maybe this all seems fitting… it’s spring and we celebrate the rejuvenation of life, Mother’s Day is around the corner & we celebrate our Mothers… but more important… it’s just a day and every day is a day to celebrate the love of a child to a Mother & a Mother to a child.

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Here’s a Good Line

SAUL BELLOW

Saul Bellow passed away yesterday. I read several of his books, and while he will not replace John Iriving as my favorite writer… he still was an extraordinarily gifted author and winning the Noble Prize for Literature is no mean feat.

I have a favorite line from his book Humboldt’s Gift (the novel written in the year before winning his Laureate). The protaganist Charlie Citrine intones, “Martinis are like ladies’ breasts… one is not enough and three are too many”.

Well… if you heard me use that line… and if you didn’t know the source, now you do…

The Times had a terrific obit today… and there was a wonderful line there that is simply terrific. Bellow had been asked why he had returned to teaching (at Boston University)

Explaining why he continued to teach, even though he was one of the most financially successful of serious American novelists, he said: “You’re all alone when you’re a writer. Sometimes you just feel you need a humanity bath. Even a ride on the subway will do that. But it’s much more interesting to talk about books. After all, that’s what life used to be for writers: they talk books, politics, history, America. Nothing has replaced that.”

“Sometimes you just feel you need a humanity bath.”

Man, do I love that line…

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Put It On Your Calendar

I got the call from Zack at 6:30PM or so. He has decided to nominate the first day after Daylight’s Savings as the best day of the year.

So I’ve been thinking about this… perhaps aided by some liquid refreshment I enjoyed last night while watching the Tar Heels put away the Fighting Illini.

Zack said that it felt glorious to get off work and be able to see blue sky and the sun (well… maybe not see the sun; but know that it hadn’t slipped below the horizon yet).

Yeah, I feel that, too. It’s not merely the snow of winter, nor the cold temperatures that is oppressive… it’s the lack of daylight. Let’s not forget, Sweden… the Land of Long Winter Nights… the Land that has given us Volvos, Blondes, Alfred Noble & Absolut also has the highest suicide rate (and they don’t kill themselves because they see too many Blondes!).

OK… I love the change of clock… even if it means giving up an hour of sack time. I like the idea of firing up the grill and cooking without a flashlight. But the Best Day of the Year?

Somewhere between Wild Turkey #1 and Wild Turkey #2 I put this idea into play.

I mean… what about other great days… you know, your Birthday, Christmas, Thanksgiving, St. Patrick’s Day, 4th of July, Labor Day, Purim (for you heathen out there, this is a small Jewish Festival which features kids getting dressed in one of three costumes, and where adults are actually encouraged to drink… Jewish Mothers keep this latter detail a secret until you’re at least 35), Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Millard Fillmore’s Birthday.

Lots of special days in the calendar.

But I’ve been thinking… as I have more days in back of me than ahead of me… that many of those special days get tangled in what was, rather than what is. There is a bitter sweetness that can enter into those days. Our memories blend older pictures with more current ones. And while there is no denying our present joy; that joy is experienced thru the prism of our past. And those special days acquire a beauty that is tinged by the sweet recollections of the celebrations that were.

Sometimes these recollections can be a mental anchor… not allowing us to enjoy that Special Day. Maybe Swedes kill themselves because nobody honors their Birthdays as they once did? And if you suffer with that… let this be a blanket Happy Birthday to you! (do you feel better?)

So that brings us back to the Monday-after-we-change-the-clocks-to-Daylight-Savings-Time. This is not dependent on anything else. We don’t have special weather needs (Opening Day at Yankee Stadium can be great; but you can freeze your balls off & that’s no fun). No special foods or drinks (OK you can’t win them all… I love any Day that has eating and drinking as a part of the Celebration).

No. It’s just a day… a day to rejuvenate our spirit. A day when, if we work in the Concrete Canyons of NYC, we emerge from our work, look to the sky and see blue… even if there is still a bite to the air, we are revived by the simplest of pleasures… it is still light. We walk with a crispness to our step, there is a smile on our face… Spring if not here, will soon be… trees will be in bud, the earth softens, lawns become green, the seashore beckons… and the Monday after we move the clocks ahead, puts these wonderful thoughts into being…

We don’t have to consider anything else… nothing to be disappointed in… it is indeed a special day.

I’m with you Zack… Yesterday was the Best Day of the Year. (and a runner-up would be the Day we move the Clocks back; but that’s a story for a different day).

Bravo, Zack.

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