Humor Patrol

No one has to remind me the seriousness of finding quality humor in the market place. Even with the advent of the internet, most of what gets passed from one citizen to the next is nothing more than tripe.

And you may think tripe is funny. I don’t. It doesn’t look good, it probably tastes worse than it looks… and it certainly isn’t funny.

It is why I have created the Humor Patrol. An organization dedicated to finding only the funniest examples of humor (not tripe) and presenting them to our subscribers. This way, you will not have to sift thru countless forwarded emails to find one that will split your sides! The Humor Patrol will do that for you!

Now this isn’t an easy task… especially when one considers the amount of tripe that is out there.

But I am sure that you will find the subscription fees perfectly in line with other professional services. The initial payment of $100. American, will be good for the first six months (six months filled with mirth and merriment).

If after receiving two installments of humor and you are not satisfied, your money will grudgingly be returned (less some incidental expenses that have been incurred on your behalf). If, however, you are deemed to be a humorless cur by the Oversight Review Committee, then you will receive an additional billing of $25. to terminate your subscription.

An example of the exceptional quality of this service is provided below. It was discovered by Senior Agents of the Patrol… Alan, working in concert with his brother Stuart. Brothers Cadan have exerted due diligence in their responsibilities, although some of their material is not meant for polite society.

This tale is gender neutral… meaning, that while it is told from one perspective, it can easily be inverted.

An 80 year old woman was arrested for shop lifting.

When she went before the judge he asked her, “What did you steal?”

She replied: a can of peaches.

The judge asked her why she had stolen them and she replied that she was hungry.

The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can.

She replied 6.

The judge then said, “I will give you 6 days in jail.”

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment the woman’s husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something.

He said, ” What is it? “

The husband said “She also stole a can of peas.”